oooomg, she just fingered me!

Oh no! It jizzed on me. I hate when that happens…

oooh mikey, if you need a hole to put it in i have one right here

and earlier

you, know, when you rip your hole…..

Mary, what are you doing with my iPhone?

….

Trick: lol, yay penis.

Mary (Posing as Nugget): Now we’re talking!! Tell me about yours.

Trick: it’s 7 1/2 cut.

Mary: Picture RIGHT now

…

WAIT!!! How old are u again?

Trick: 19

Mary: Soooooooooooooooooo Watcha doing???

Let this be a lesson to everyone… Hide your iPhones when Mary’s-a-trollin the 19 year olds…

OMG, i’m trying to avoid balls, what do i do??

and THEN

i don’t do well with balls falling on my head

and THEN

what? i’m just playing with your balls

“sometimes i get really excited and forget to swallow”

“not that i’m saying there’s anything wrong with lady gaga’s cooch, but, you know….”

“i have way too many pussy pictures on my iphone”

Oh no!! I have taco pull out!  And now I have white stuff all over my hands!!