Mary’s Blog
Today I had my first muff experience!! It wasn’t something I woke up thinking about it just happened. As I’m guessing that’s the way these things go.
I didn’t have to have the muff. Sure there was other choices….but why not try something new, right?
I thought about it all morning. I mean was I ready to do this? What if I didn’t like it, what then? Finally the time had come. I looked at the colored picture of the muff and decided it was now or never. I was so excited…..that I had to tell everyone!
Before I knew it I had a box in front of my face. Before I opened it I noticed the strange smell coming from within Well I was hoping this was normal but I didn’t know! So it was go time, I finally opened it and to my surprise it was bigger then I was expecting and looked delicious.
I dove right in. It was salty and left my hands a little slippery but I was totally into it. However due to the size of this muff I couldn’t finish it all in one sitting, so I closed the box up and decided to take it home and share with the hubs.
The end!
PS- I’m talking about Jason’s Deli Muffaletta. :p
Ok, I get it were slackers. However Sunny is more of a slacker then I. She gives me crap for posting too much stuff. Well its easier for me cause I have a cooler phone then her. (Right Itty?)
So here’s how our conversation goes:
Sunny- Damn Mary do you think you posted enough?
Mary- whhhhhhhat?! I did it all from my phone, thru out the day.
Sunny- Dammmn Gina!!
Mary- CALM DOWN Boobs McGee
Sunny- Shutup or I’ll cut you.
Mary- Promises, promises
Sunny- No, seriously I AM going to cut you
Mary- Blah, blah, blah
Sunny- Shut up Jew
Mary- Racist bitch! (then I’ll punch her in the boob.)
ok, so I forgot what I was talking about. Blame the wine or the hubs watching Revenge of the Nerds in the background.
“”Those nerds are a threat to our way of life. “
Hippies one and two invited us down to their place in Mesquite, NV. Well it was either paint and work on the house or risk the chance of liver and skin cancer.
Decisions, decisions………..
Well with our bags packed, the hubs and I headed down after work on Friday. The drive down was relaxing and such pretty scenery. The hubs man likes to drive and I like to sleep, so it works out perfectly!!
The weekend was a BLAST!! We gambled a little and girl hippie being the major winner. We ate, we swam, we drank and we ate some more. The hubs and I played bingo “or BIGNO, please view our http://travelingtapeworm.blogspot.com/ for an explanation” for the first time. Can you say addicted!! Its cheap and the hours bye. AGAIN girl hippie won….but I was one away, I tell ya, one away!!!
If you ever find yourself in Mesquite theres a few things you need to do:
-Go to the Eureka Casino and play the Peguins slot machine. (SUPER LUCKY…wellll if your a girl hippie!)
-Play BINGO!!! Its fun, its easy and you can get different color stampers!!
-AND get the BLT at the cafe! So YUMMMMMMMY!!
But the most important thing to remember is stop at Lee’s Liquor and Tavern. Its an acholics dream….not that I am one, so don’t you judge me….but if I were, I would want to be buried here. Besides having every beverage under the sun, they are CHEAP!! A drinking Jews paradise!!!! (I also attached a picture of my puchases and drinking a bottle of wine as I type) 
The only downside to Nevada is COCKROACHES (but none in the house)!!! They scare the sh!t out of me. I don’t even want to talk about them, so moving on people, moving on.
Monday morning came to fast, also that was the help with the garbage truck coming by at 6:10am. Anyways, hubs and I packed up and headed home, while the hippies headed to the pool. So now is the time to bare all…..
We got brunch in St George at Honey Baked Ham. It was delish as always! However on a side note…..I did not appreciate the cute pig pictures in the bathroom. I don’t want to know how adorable my food was at one time. Luckily I had the turkey sammich.
On the road again and shortly after I started to feel sick (although I was sick late Sunday night) and so begins the journey of my bathroom trips from St George to Nephi. *SIGH*
If you know me, then you know I have a public bathroom fear/issue. Well lets just saying when you need to go or/and vomit you go. 
I think I’ve visited every Flying J on the way home and I must say, surprisingly enough they are actually nice. The only disgusting bathroom was at the Fillmore Chevron Bathroom. Alright, enough about food babies and vomit.
So besides the above issues we did see allot of funny/odd stuff:
-There was a guy announcing he was single on his car. (I’ll attach a pic)
-We saw a guy getting road head. The hubs says “lucky!”
-We saw a doe, a deer, a female deer…..eating with some cows.
-I LOVE BEAVER hoodies.
-An adorable Tea Cup poodle and I WANT ONE!
I enjoyed the trip and just want to say THANK YOU again to boy and girl hippie for inviting us. As much fun as vacations are, even mini-vacas…its always good to be home. I missed my babies!!
Single and Ready to Mingle. (He looked like Sock from Reaper)
BOOOOOOOZE!!!! Minus 2 big bottles
Oh Em Gee!!! Its hot, hot, HOT in our house.
So apparantly the central air stopped working today and as of right now….8:48 pm mtn….its 96 degrees. This is with all windows and doors opened and fans going.
What makes it worse is the hubs is sick and I can’t tell if he still has a fever or its cause the heat way in our home is causing it.
I was going to get us a hotel room, with a spa and a pool but more importantly…. room service…..but the hubs just wants to stay in bed. I totally get it. When I’m sick, all I want is my bed.
ooooook its to hot to type….must take a cold shower now.
ps- central air man is coming tomorrow!! THANK GOD!
WOOHOOOOOO!!! Another morning we got to sleep in.
Woke up, went grocery shopping and came home and started getting ready for the Fathers Day BBQ.
While I was washing the dishes I couldn’t help but notice the new dish soap I have smells like Appletinis. Now you may be thinking, wow Mary talks about booze alot. She may have a problem, well people I don’t. A person with a drinking problem would have stopped doing dishes and made an Appletini right then and there. Well……I finished the dishes and then made some Appletinis. Do you see the difference?
Silverfox, Old Man and Amazon showed up and the BBQ began. I made garlic herb BBQ chicken, pasta salad, asparagus, garlic butter rolls and fruit shortcake. The food was so good and everyone enjoyed everything. We have no leftovers, which is always a good sign.
Conversation was wonderful and we shared many laughs. Our cats loved the Old Man and out blind cat knows how to boss Amazon around. Its rather cute.
So started washing the dishes again, had another Appletini and then hubs and I watched True Blood. I LOVE THAT SHOW!!
Also I was going to write a story about a fence, but I’m still a little disturbed so I rather not talk about it.
Hey! Wheres the holes?
Saturday, Saturday…. what a great day.
FINALLY we got a chance to sleep in and it was much needed!!!
We got a 2nd coat of paint on our dining room and finally its done! Now to start on the stairway and finish up the kitchen. The new home is slowly, but surely coming along.
Later that night we went to the hippies house for a BBQ. It was soooo much fun and to all our surprise the hubs ate a Gardenburger!! (quick background on my hubs, he hates veggies!)
I introduced my newest drink and girl hippie and I named it Pinkie B. It was delish and it creeps up on you. 
What a fun night spent with some good friends. Boy hippie made us a fire and we made smores using Nutella and they were YUMMY!!
Princess, Itty, Hippies, Hubs and Sunnyshine I absolutely adore all of you!!
MY LEMON!!!! Apparently it was in my drawer at work, don’t ask. :I
Dearest SilverFox,
Thank you for reading my blog. I’m so glad that *Amazon shared it with you. (there may have been an eye roll, whilst writing that sentence). *codename
I know there is some quotes on here that are a little inappropriate, but let me tell you…..they are all innocent and totally taken out of context. You see the other blogger Sunny is a hippie and well I’m sure you’ve known hippies in your day and they are all complete liars and always high (may or maynot be true), so people should never trust them….just saying.
Please keep seeing me as the innocent BABY of the family….yeah Amazon are you reading this now, you old hag….anyways I got a bit sidetracked. I appreciate the life lessons you’ve taught me such as:
-Never giving away the milk for free. (a little late on this talk though, but we still got married. )
-How to take a ZILLION pictures of rock and cacti while on vacation.
-How one should never rush into your parents room early on Christmas morning.
-How to make noise in the morning so people in the house know that another one is awake, therefore maybe allowing said person to cover up a bit more before answering a phone call.
-and that its ok to lift your shirt during breakfast, cause all the cool kids are doing it.
BUT my favorite one is how to correctly pronounce liquor, you know the fancy way instead of it sounding like “lickher”. It just sounds classy and I like saying it. Maybe that’s why I visit the Liquor store so much.
Seriously though THANK YOU for all you’ve done and continuously do for me. I LOVE YOU more then words can ever say or anything I could ever type in a blog. Ani ohevet otakh
OK, well I have to go now…the hubs just came and got me all wet. *again totally innocent.
ps- Can I borrow $20?
Besides wearing a lame wrist brace and miss placing a lemon (which I’m still looking for) today rocked!!!
I love my job and I love my co-workers. They make the day go by fast.
Today when I was checking my FB feed on my phone I saw that our blog site got a shout out on Grimmleighs FB site!!! AWESOME!!!
Again if you haven’t “like”ed them or don’t know what I’m talking about shame on you! Scroll down for the entry titled My Grimmleigh Fiend.
Then during some down time Sunny and I was checking 97.1 website for the link “Messages from the dead” and the Hollywood sleaze. We then saw something that said funny blog site. We made the joke that, lets see if this so called “funny blog” is as funny as ours. HOLY SH!T BATMAN, its our very own blog. Thats right Little B’s, it’s our BLOG!!
So Jay thanks for sending me a couple emails to check in, sorry I have been MIA. I hope you enjoy our posts. Sunny and I promise to at least post one thing each daily…..riiiiight Sunny?!
—–> FRANKIE if you actually read this, I’m a huge fan of the show!!!!! I completely love you and Jessica. Thank you for putting it on your site.
http://zoo.971zht.com/main.html
and lastly what made this day even better is I won a Best Buy gift card for just being AWESOME. I’m always winning things at work! (Did I mention that I love my job?)
PS- to the Magical Tiger Woods at work, thanks for the card tricks and entertainment.
The family went to Shrek last weekend and I liked it. Wasn’t my fave Shrek movie, but it was still funny.
I will tell you that I loved the new villain Rumpelstiltskin. I think it’s because he reminded me of my Itty Bitty. Both adorable, sassy, classy and short. Now, if I can only get Itty to start wearing wigs.
See the resemblance??
and you can create your very own Orge!!